It’s just unnecessary and makes me always feel uneasy like I don’t even know what to say or how to react to people when they get belligerently angry. Like just now when my dad flew off the handle at me. Not to mention it just drastically makes me sad knowing that there’s nothin I can do change the situation to make him feel like he doesn’t have to be that way. It’s just so emotionally taxing to live in this house and I don’t think I can do it for much longer. That’s why I’m kinda excited for school. At first I was skeptical about UC and then was pretty sure I didn’t want to go there but now I’m just ready to begin a new chapter in my life and GTFO this town!
That moment when you’re down on yourself but then think no fuck that I’m awesome but then think ahhh but sometimes I’m not so awesome but then you think no no wait I’m a total bamf and I don’t care what anyone else thinks but then you think ahhh but other times I’m such a dweeb but then you think but I am pretty fun and outgoing well at least I have that going for me.
But anymore I just lye awake with my thoughts and it suuuuuucks butt